Occasionally people ask if they should have their adult children sit in on their retirement planning appointments. While I am all for meeting the whole family, the answer to this question depends on your situation.
For some, letting Junior know that there is wealth at the end of the parental life rainbow might leave them sleeping with one eye open. Or, if not that dramatic, parents worry that kids who think they don’t need to make their own way in life won’t.
But, hey, young adults are often much more self-motivated than we think. And knowing that their parents plan to help them with, say, investing for the grandkids’ college, can really help adult children with their own financial planning.
On the plus side
- Estate Planning: Ditch the Drama
- Why recreate the Knives Out reading of the will scene? Let them in on the plot twist early—no need for surprise endings (or surprise feuds).
- Financial Education: Teach Them Before TikTok Does
- If you don’t explain compound interest, they’ll learn about it on social media—right after the latest dance challenge.
- Values in Action:
- If your plan is to direct some of your estate to your favorite llama shelter or doomsday cult, knowing this in advance should save the kids from disappointment or the idea of contesting your will.
- Emergency Prep: Avoid the “Where’s the Safe?” Scavenger Hunt
- If something happens, they’ll know who to call—and won’t have to tear up the floorboards looking for your life insurance policy.
- You Might Need Help
- As we age, learning new things (like how to be a retiree and managing your investments) can be harder. Your kid may be better at this and more interested in personal finance than you are. And who is more interested in your financial stability than your kids? Having that extra support could be a huge help to you.
The risks
- Privacy:
- Some things are better left a mystery—like your Beanie Babies collection.
- Independence: They’re Adults—Let Them Make Their Own Money Mistakes
- Some kids (I have one of these) only learn by doing. And by doing, I mean screwing up and cleaning up their own meses.
- Financial Pressure: You Thought Arguing Over Legos in Target Was Bad
- The more they know, the more requests you might field for that “can’t-miss” crypto startup or dispensary investment.
Ultimately, your kids will find out about your finances. When that happens depends on their age, maturity, and even your ability to manage finances without aid.
Kind of like becoming a parent in the first place – you will know when it’s time.
